It took my 23 long years, but I think I'm finally understanding women.
BACK STORY: Last night was one of the most depressing nights of my life. Some of you may know, I'm a HUGE Royals fan. It's pretty pathetic. They have never won anything my whole life and yet I root for them and attend games year after year. Well last night they got all the way to Game 7 of the World Series and lost by one run. I was devastated. If you listened to my show after 11pm last night you could probably hear the lump in my voice. Pathetic, I know.
BACK TO THE POINT: Today I told myself, "You are not gonna let some stupid sports team get you down, go shopping!" So that's exactly what I did. I went shopping and bought myself a pair of shoes. I FEEL AMAZING. Who knew that buying a pair of shoes could change your whole outlook on life?
Women, I'm going to figure you completely out one of these days. Today, I figured out why you invented retail therapy.
Happy Halloween Eve - muahahahaha! That was my creepy laugh all typed out. Did you read it in a super creepy voice? You have to. Go back and read the "muahahahaha" in a creepy voice then come back to this spot. .....Go ahead, I'll wait.
Seriously. Go do it. I promise it'll be fun. Do it. Fine. You're lazy, I'll type it again and you can read it out loud super creepy like. Ready? Muahahahahahahahahaha!!!!
Ok....Thank you. Wasn't that fun? Here's the random viral videos and other internet junk I've ran across this morning.
Imagine all the creepy kids from every horror movie you've ever seen. Now imagine all their parents have important meetings. This, is the creepy kid daycare:
Weird stuff all dog owners do, is spot on.
Goat says "what what"! I love goat!
Don't like scary movies? Here are some solid reasons why everyone should watch them.
Finally - here's video of that super awkward award presentation after last night's World Series.